Unfortunately this is all true. And it all comes down to the substitutions.Indeed, and the important people in this debate are the match officials. They gave a penalty end of.
you should focus on why, at home, you went one up then allowed Spurs to dominate, equalise, save a penalty, go 2-1 up in time added but conspire to give them an opportunity to put a ball into the danger area. That's on your team not the match officials