The government is to blame for this. The Tory government. fecking Tories.
Unless it's the mayor's fault. The Tory mayor, that would be. Lazy cnut.
Fortunately the Big Society will solve this problem. Even as I speak an army of cockneys is swarming out from their homes armed with shovels and grit-speaders to save the day. Thank god Cameron showed us the way.
Next thing you know they will be selling our gold reserves when prices are at multi-year lows, reneging on an electoral promise on a referendum on the European Constitution and knighting Sir Fred...